[One of his hands slips to Alucard's waist when Alucard clutches at him, holding him gently and easily while they indulge in each other. It would be so easy to succumb to his own fervent, aching need; it fills him so completely that he could drown in it, but he recognises the depths of it and-

Is it really Alucard who needs to make a confession?]

The state of affairs are unusual enough that I think I can give the delay a pass.

[He leans his face into Alucard's neck. His mind is a-whirr with thoughts, but he still takes the time to listen.

It's a slow, clawing realisation, what exactly this desperate need signifies, why Alucard's words mean so much to him, why he's enough to soothe the ache of loss and failure, and why he's so discontent with Integra's presence. He wants Alucard in a way he shouldn't, in a way Alucard can't reciprocate. In a way Integra already has already earned, occupying a space Anderson will never have access to. He isn't Alucard's grounding force, in the end.

He presses himself close to Alucard.]

You're going to need to perform a lot of penance for that, I'm afraid. Conveniently, we seem to be in hell, so killing a few of those tomb-dwellers should suffice as a start.

[The weight of everything drops against his shoulders again, but he pushes back, this time, and drags his lips on Alucard's throat. He doesn't want to let go yet. It might be the last time he lets himself do this.]

But we can spare a few moments more, before that. Tell me everything you wish to say. You have my ear.